Give ‘Em The Old Razzle Dazzle

Litigation Value: Training on Diversity and Harassment = $5,000; Settlement of Countless Employee Claims = a Shocking Amount; Years Worth of “That’s What She Said” Jokes = Priceless.

With Michael’s final season quickly approaching, last night’s repeat got me thinking about all my favorite Michael moments over the seasons. While Michael can be a human resources nightmare, he certainly has made us laugh (when we weren’t cringing).  Here’s a list of my top 10 favorite examples of Michael’s “dash of razzle dazzle” management style. Who knows? Maybe TBS will even include a few of them during its Labor Day marathon of The Office.

1. Michael grilling his foot on his George Foreman and scolding his employees for their lack of compassion toward his “disability.”
2. Michael mistaking the company’s tech support employee for a terrorist before mistaking an insurance salesman for the mafia.
3. Michael pelting college students with candy bars before dramatically exiting with a shout of “SUCK ON THAT!”
4. Michael’s painfully drawn-out efforts to lay off an employee. “Yeah, I went hunting once. Shot a deer in the leg. Had to kill it with a shovel. Took about an hour. Why do you ask?”
5. Michael asking Oscar if he prefers a less offensive term than “Mexican.”
6. Michael asking Oscar for advice on how to make a colonoscopy more pleasurable and whether he should have a safe word.
7. Michael unwittingly purchasing salad when trying to buy drugs to frame Toby.
8. Michael dressing up as “Prison Mike,” calling Angela a “beyotch,”  and telling Ryan he’d be the “belle of the ball.”
9. Michael dubbing himself the “King of [Email] Forwards” and explaining, “You wouldn’t arrest a guy who was just passing drugs from one guy to another.”
10. Michael finding something smelly and unpleasant in his office and exclaiming, “I am a victim of a hate crime! Stanley knows what I’m talking about . . . . Well, I hated it. A lot!”

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  Kristin Starnes Gray, FordHarrison
  Kristin Gray represents management in labor and employment matters in the courts, in arbitration, and before government agencies, including the EEOC, the U.S. Department of Labor, the South Carolina Department of Labor, the South Carolina Human Affairs Commission, and other agencies at the federal, state and local level. She concentrates her practice on representing management in matters related to employment issues including discrimination, harassment, and retaliation claims under Title VII, the ADA, the ADEA, and state law. Kristin also assists management with issues related to HIPAA compliance, employment policies, handbooks, the FMLA, contracts, separation agreements, wage and hour, and other workplace matters. Find her on LinkedIn here.