Next on our list of possible candidates for Michael Scott’s recently vacated position is Darryl Philbin, also known as “Mittah Rogers” (but only by Michael). Darryl has come a long way since we first met him in Season 1 as he watched Dwight suddenly emerge from a box in the warehouse. Here’s my list of pros and cons for Darryl as boss.
1. Darryl knows more about the importance of timely shipments than anyone else in the office. Too bad his claim to fame of successfully shipping “2.5 billion units” merely refers to sheets of paper.
2. Employees will have to beware of lying about “finding” things in the warehouse. Darryl knows every square inch of it, including the fact that there are no new computers for Andy lying around in there. However, Pam’s efforts to scratch the computer and make it look less new were amusing.
3. Darryl will certainly be supportive of employees’ efforts to receive appropriate pay, even if the underpaid employee is Michael wearing a ridiculous ladies’ suit.
4. Darryl has excellent experience dealing with outrageous employee antics, including talking Michael out of jumping from the roof in order to demonstrate the dangers of depression.
5. Darryl is well versed on the safety rules, except for the teensy weensy matter of him breaking his leg while using the warehouse lift as an elevator and then lying about the circumstances of his injury.
1. Offering to help your employees find “loose women” in the bookstore is probably not the best idea, even if your efforts are merely intended to camouflage your true mission of getting an e-book reader.
2. Employees cannot trust any attempts by Darryl to teach them “black man phrases.” However, Darryl convincing Michael to say phrases like “bippity boppity gimme the zoppity” and “dinkin flicka” is one of my favorite Office moments.
3. There could be real problems for the company if Darryl decides to start dating Kelly Kapoor (a subordinate) again. Though, I trust he learned his lesson the first time and realized that Kelly needed to access her “uncrazy side.”
4. Forwarding a topless photo of Jan Levenson to other employees before blowing it up to poster size for display in the warehouse was probably not Darryl’s most professional moment.
5. Telling a coworker you are in a gang, even if it is the Newsies, is probably not the best idea. However, I enjoyed Darryl’s description of the gang’s nonviolent method of resolving conflict through “Fluffy Fingers” or tickling.
We would love to learn your thoughts on Darryl as a job candidate. Until next time, dinkin flicka.