The descriptor “emotional” often has a negative connotation, especially in the workplace. It can conjure up images of someone who lacks control, loses his or her temper, and lacks sound judgment. But Kristi Hedges, in an article for Harvard Business Review, notes that this association—and the corresponding reluctance to show emotion in the workplace—can actually be counterproductive for managers.
“Leaders craft such a solid professional persona that they fail to be themselves,” she writes, “unintentionally quashing the emotional qualities that build followership, and leaving their peers and direct reports scratching their heads.”
It’s understandable that managers often try to maintain a poker face. They often want to be seen as the unshakable rock in their departments—the person others can count on in a crisis. “We never want to lose our composure, so we develop strategies for keeping a professional face on,” Hedges writes. “And remaining dispassionate can be an asset. However, that same carefully crafted exterior falls flat when, as leaders, we need to build engagement and enthusiasm.” Hedges suggests three ways that managers can effectively embrace their emotions in the workplace:
Set Your Intention
“If you don’t deliberately express the emotional tenor,” writes Hedges, “it will happen by accident.” In other words, before you unleash those emotions, have a clear idea of the message you want to send. Consider it controlled emotion.
Use Emotional Language
Language is important. If you are trying to convey a particular emotion, don’t be afraid to use language—work appropriate, of course—that helps convey that emotion.
Employ Emotional Appeals
Emotional appeals are tried and true methods to win people over to an argument. Emotional appeals work well in marketing and politics; they can work just as well in the workplace.
Contrary to commonly held wisdom, revealing passionate emotions can be a benefit to managers—as long as those emotions are appropriate for the workplace and for the situation. While we certainly wouldn’t advocate for managers to start yelling and screaming when things don’t go as planned, we do believe that showing employees dedication, compassion, and drive through your emotions can be a great motivator. Hiding those same emotions can make managers seem uninspiring, aloof, and uninterested.
The bottom line: Practice being appropriately emotional in the workplace. It’s a good strategy for engagement.